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Aarrghh!

I am a girl (more like a lady now) and I am at an age when all that everybody around me is worried about is when will I 'settle' down.

Its crazy, you know? All of my friends are all busy getting married these days. Kids younger than me by years are all busy too with the same work. And then, I have my sister at home who's due in September. So the routine now when we meet friends:

Aunty: Hiiii.. how are you ma? How is your health now? Morning sickness and all is still there ah?
Sister: yes aunty - a little weak. Nausea and all.. its tiring.
Aunty: Yes yes... it will be like this for sometime. You must do this, then do that and also don't forget to do that thing also, ok na?
(turning to me) - So Sindhu, You are next... we are all waiting for you to follow the steps now, you know? Hihihi...

And if it was an elderly lady, you can replace the last dialogue with - So Sindhu, you are next.. if we can see you also like this as soon as possible (cough), we'll be happy when we have to pass on, you know (cough, cough)...

And there I am, with a stoopid grin on my face, but cringing inside! Sigh :-|

Its so difficult actually, when people keep asking you such questions. I mean - I know they mean well and all that, but then, things will happen when they have to, right? It's not like I control everything. And add to it, its not at all an easy decision! Think about it - you are going to be saying yes to someone you are going to spend ALLLLLLL of your future with!! And there's no way ever to get out of the effects that the decision will have on you, your life and your immediate family - whether happy or otherwise. Marriage is such a big gamble, no?

It doesn't make things any easier for me considering am basically confused about this whole thing and when somebody asks me what I want - I go--.Umm... its like.. err.. It should be.. uh.. I don't know..! And my mom, with a tired face, says.. Sigh! I know you don't know what you want! And you aren't ready to listen to us give you any ideas, either.

But throughout all this drama, I have to thank God for being my constant companion in the form of my parents & sister. Most of my in-a-similar-situation friends whine about how their people are pressurising them too much to get married to a business-man guy from Dubai or an SWE from USA. But my dad & mom say - Sin, we know its not an easy decision, but we are around to do this together. And my sister's forever talking about how different things will be before & after marriage and what to try to understand from the initial stages itself, rather than just looking at a person superficially & being impressed by it.

I have learnt that the girly dreams I had 6 years back belong to Utopia and practicality is the way to go in this world. All I can do is hope for the best and hope things work out the best way.


(P.s. Random rant it is. Subbu - you'll get your fun-filled post soon. Kindly adjust madi :D)

10 wrote about this one!:

subbulakshmistoned said...

haha. have you told them about the greatness of a man, that is the boss, yet?

Sindhu :) said...

Ya - they know how stupid male bosses can be! :D

n.aka.zephyr said...

Tell me about it! Every male friend I bring home is looked at by moi family with a 'potential marriage material' tag. It's driving me up the wall!

Ellen said...

I can understand how you feel because i am a mother too with three daughters. Christine, the middle child, got married last October to the man of her choice. I can see that she's happy with that.. and so is Daniel, her spouse.

As is the culture and tradition here, parents or families don't arrange the weddings of their daughters. The choice is left to them to decide whom to marry and when. They simply guide them along with proper advise.

Just as you have said, marriage is a serious thing and you have to be very careful about choosing the partner of your life. Marriage has a 'No exchange-No return' tag on it... instead a 'Forever' sign in big bold letters is hung up for all to see. You will be happy or miserable for the rest of your life... depending on the choices that you make.

So take your sweet time. And pray for God's help and guidance to send you the right person. A good man which you so deserve.

Good luck and God bless you.

Sindhu :) said...

Zephie!!

I am SOOO happy to see your comment! How have you been ya?!

Same pinch :D Its maddening na?! :D

Sindhu :) said...

Ellen - sooo true!! No exchange-no return tag indeed! Which is the scariest part - its not like you can say ok I don't like it - and discard it! :D

Thanks so much for your wishes Ellen - you never fail to make a person smile :)

Sneo said...

agreed. marriage is a maha big gamble. its like you know it all and yet you know nothing. confuses the daylights out of your brain.

Sunrays said...

Add to the list of unsolicited advice :D

When you say more like a lady not a girl...signs say you better "settle".

TC,

Kanupriya said...

ah don't worry, it wont stop even if u get married. then the next question will be - when r u giving us "good" news and when you have one, then it will be - u must have a second one soon, its not good to have much gap between two...and blah blah and blah...
so take your time, get married when you want to and get married with whom you want to. its a life long decision and so should be taken as much carefully as possible, and at the end its somehwhat destiny too. enjoyyy :)

KParthasarathi said...

Kanupriya has said it very nicely.
I agree with her

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